Routine meeting turns into unexpected gift

First day of kindergarten

First day of fifth grade

When Mark and I stepped into Ben's middle school conference last Tuesday, I thought the experience would be fairly routine. Maybe we'd hear about test scores and class placements, discuss the logistics of the transition.

What we got instead was completely unexpected. Ben met us in the office at the appointed time and escorted us to the guidance counselor's office. Clearly these fifth-graders are beginning to hone their people skills, which is great.

Working from a script, Ben led the first part of the meeting. First, he shared with us a name poem he'd created: Brainy, Energetic, Nice, and he invited Mark and me to share other words that describe him. I chose curious, citing his insatiable hunger for knowledge.

Ben shared some self-reflection and goals he'd been working on throughout the year. I was impressed with his insight into himself. Among his goals were improving his performance in art class (check) and trying to become more outgoing (not check - he's still so shy). Turns out our oldest is a kinesthetic - or hands-on - learner. That fits for the kid who can't watch a TV show without pacing or bouncing a ball, who chews pencils to bits, who gets frustrated having to wait to listen to instructions that he already understands.

We learned that Ben's class has already begun to do career assessments. It was fascinating to see that (at this extremely early stage) his career interests include writer (me!) and chemist (Mark with the science/health care background).

Watching Ben take the lead, it was funny to observe his mannerisms: keep working on that eye contact, buddy, and less yawning definitely is advisable. Though the experience clearly was a little uncomfortable for him, he pushed through it, and that's a lesson he can take forward in life.

The whole experience really was a gift to me. I treasured the opportunity to reflect on Ben's elementary school years. I appreciated the chance to look my boy in the eye and tell him exactly why he's special to me.

At the end of the meeting, the guidance counselor left us stars on which we could write a message that she would deliver to Ben. This was the point at which my eyes began to well up and I had to struggle to maintain composure. Let me tell you, parents of young ones, you will not believe how quickly these milestones arrive.

I came away from all of this with renewed appreciation for my unique, exceptional boy. I love every bit of him, from his messy handwriting to his tipping over his chair when he gets excited to his unbridled enthusiasm and determination to his amazingly bright mind.

I would say that I cannot wait to see what Ben will become, but that's not exactly accurate. Let's take it nice and slow for the next seven years or so.